


Truth and Reconciliation

by embarrassingresultofmyfreetime



Category: Doctor Who, Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: Alternate Ending, Fix-It, Gen, Missing Scene, lots and lots of angst, who needs canon when writing is free lol
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-11
Updated: 2020-08-11
Packaged: 2021-03-06 07:35:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 7,563
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25829773
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/embarrassingresultofmyfreetime/pseuds/embarrassingresultofmyfreetime
Summary: “I... I destroyed a lot of things, but not this... trove of secrets. This is what started it all.”Missing Scene where the Master goes to Gallifrey and discovers the truth of the timeless child for the first time + alternate ending to The Timeless Children episode
Relationships: The Doctor & The Master (Doctor Who), Thirteenth Doctor & The Master, Thirteenth Doctor & The Master (Dhawan)
Comments: 10
Kudos: 26





	1. Truth

**Author's Note:**

> Warnings: death, suicidal intent, murder via explosives, self-hatred, grief,… uh… mentions of torturing children, child death mention
> 
> Doctor Who is rated TV-PG so I just rated this as T. Feel free to let me know if you think I should rate this higher.
> 
> Anyways, I know I should be updating my other fics but oh well here's some angst lol

"I was just playing, hacking the system. I got lost in there... and then I found... _everything_."

It wasn't completely a lie.

The Master really had gone home and slipped ever so carefully into the Matrix room one night when there was no one else around to interfere.

He _had_ been playing. He had gone deep into the Matrix to replay some of his greatest hits. Perhaps find a piece of his identity that he had lost along the way when the High Council's manipulation began to corrode his mind from an all too young age and the Doctor's abandonment pushed him to the brink of his remaining sanity.

Outside, the world was dry and cold in the night air, but from where the Master sat completely still on the Matrix's platform- dust caked on the soles of his shoes and pressed into his clothes- he felt a warmth that only reminiscing on past memories could bring him these days.

The Master _had_ been hacking the system. He'd edited together clips of the Doctor and himself from simpler times. Back when they were warmer, back when the Master's made up games never failed to bring bright smiles to their faces.

 _The Master had gotten lost._ He had been watching an old scene from when he and the Doctor used to run across those red fields he remembered so fondly. They got in so much trouble for skipping class to do so- but in all his lives he'd never regretted the decision for a single second.

He never wished to go back to a moment so much. Back when they were young and innocently ignorant to the world around them. Back to when the universe was just the two of them thinking about traveling together and coming up with impossible hypotheticals as their nervous hands occasionally brushed against each other, without knowing that if either mustered the strength to simply reach out, the other would most certainly take their hand.

It ached something terrible in his chest, a gentle pain in his hearts as he wondered how things could have gone so wrong when they had once felt so right.

And then the Master found... _everything_.

At first it appeared to be nothing- a tiny blip in the ancient memory bank, if even that. But then he made the mistake of scratching at the old film and uncovered a second, lingering layer trapped beneath it. One cradled deeper in both their memories that dragged him under and further back than he had ever been.

The Master didn't know what he was looking at. Not at first anyways. All he _did_ know was that he couldn't look away. He kept diving and he kept watching as if he was living it himself.

A child... looking up at this purple sky that dissolved into nothing. Like a tear in the universe that shouldn't be there, lingering high up over a huge monument. Someone stood at the base of it, a small, mysterious child dressed in beautiful golden robes.

Was he the child, watching the scene unfold? Or was he the woman in ancient attire approaching the child? No, no, he was certainly watching it unfold from a third perspective.

He watched and watched and he couldn't look away. At first it appeared reasonable enough. The child was... rescued... right?

It must be, and they went back, and... that was Gallifrey, was it not?

But then... the accident- a fall from a tall height- followed by a regeneration. And then-

Even the Master, who had seen so many gory deaths, had seen the life drain from so many creatures' eyes over his many, many years...

Even _he_ winced and turned away when he began to understand what was happening. This scientist, this explorer, Tecteun, began to go too far. She began to force regenerations on the child... not even considering what she was doing, not realizing that these were deaths.

And it took so painfully long. The child grew up scared and afraid. The Master recognized that look all too well and he could barely contain the pain he felt at the sight of such horror, the rage situating itself comfortably inside him like a fire in his very core, ablaze.

He watched the child be put in danger over and over. He watched the people who had promised to take care of the child, take life after life, again and again, 'for the greater good', until the Master lost track of how many children there had been before.

It was all just memories. This was all in the past and he knew there was nothing he could do to change the course it took. Still, he lashed out once- on impulse alone.

He instinctively reached for the child the first time they attempted to refuse. The first time they began to realize what was happening and begged for this to stop because they wanted to _live_. The Master had been too immersed to realize, too hurt and scared himself to hold himself back.

He leapt to action and put himself between the child and these people- as if that would make any difference.

Of course it didn't. Of course... the child died anyways.

And these people- these not-yet-Time-Lords who believed the ends would justify the means- stood over the child's tiny body mercilessly. Nothing more than another life they'd taken far too soon simply because they didn't understand the damage they were causing.

Or maybe... they did know what they were doing. And maybe they just didn't care.

The Master would never find out, but it didn't matter. Even he knew this was wrong. Even he knew that to take advantage of one's trust in turn made you the monster.

He knew the kind of vengeful god this child would grow up to be if this didn't stop- because he himself had been made into the perfect example.

The show kept going, even when the Master couldn't bear another second.

Death after death, lie after manipulation after tactic- one after another- to keep the child in line. To keep them from leaving.

But you can't dissect a frog and expect it to live a long and healthy life.

It kept going until one day, almost by chance, it was over. Tecteun had unlocked the key to the regenerative ability. She took it and modified it and shaped it into a tool.

And even then they didn't let the child go.

Instead, they sent the child away- a child who was all but grown up by now. They gave the child missions and simulations and goals- but it was simply more tests. Tests that had moved from the physical to mental. Tests to take the child's brilliance for their own purposes and scrub the slate clean when they were done just to try again.

And... it was painful.

It was painful to watch and it was painful for the child themself.

The Master knew there were tears behind his eyes, an outburst waiting to happen, the blaze in his hearts ready to spread like a wildfire.

But not yet. He wasn't done here yet.

He watched until- all at once- the reel ran out of film. It simply ended. Everything beyond that redacted, everything beyond that blank.

He wondered... well he hoped... that perhaps the child had escaped. Maybe they had finally broken out of this hell and the memory was blank because there was no longer a mind to be connected.

But then... Then he... Then....

The Doctor's highlights resumed- an orphan child who hid themself away for reasons no one understood. A child who was allowed into the Academy and met the Master's younger counterpart and who wanted nothing more than to leave their dusty old world for something better.

And that face... that smile... it was the same... wasn't it?

There was a reason all those old secrets had been buried under the brilliant madman called the Doctor.

The Master didn't know how to react at first. He truly didn't know. His eyes scoured every detail for answers but his body fell still and cold.

He and the Doctor had built their lives on each other- from the ground up. They were the only people each other had ever really had. They were so special, what they had was so one in a quadrillion. They'd ONLY EVER had each other.

They were....

Was that a lie as well?

All the times the Doctor acted special, all the times she caused trouble knowing full well how to escape its repercussions, all the brilliance and the ability and their inexplicably perfect mind.

This was the answer. The Doctor hadn't been starting from scratch.

Just as always, the Doctor was running off ahead and the Master was struggling to catch up.

Did the Doctor know any of this?

That "born to rule" had always been a lie?

Worse: What would she do when she found out?

Because she would find out. She always did. She always had to know everything.

And now the Master knew why.

The secret felt like it was tearing him apart. His chest hurt, his hearts ached like never before. The rage... the pain... the disbelief of something so terrible and yet the way it fell so perfectly into line with their reality.

It explained everything really.

How their little empire could stand tall over fields of dust and death. How they were supposedly 'meant to rule' yet stood idly by.

Of course it was a lie. Of course there was no 'God Given' right for them to tower over the universe.

Of course they weren't meant for greatness.

They were just willing to do whatever it took to make their way to the top.

Tecteun never even considered going back. Never considered risking herself instead and venture through that boundary. The Master wondered if the thought had even ever occurred to her.

Did she ever think to return the child? To help the child find their people?

For some reason, the Master doubted it was ever more than a fleeting thought on her mind.

The Master fell to his knees and clutched his chest as the Matrix flickered and he fell from the deep archives.

His eyes snapped open in the real world, tears breaking out from his eyes and streaming down his face. He brought his body closer into itself and dipped his head in some kind of mourning.

He and the Doctor weren't equals. They weren't ever equals.

The Doctor was special… and the Master was never anything more than an experiment.

It felt wrong- so, so, unbelievably wrong.

This wasn't their story. This wasn't... the way this was supposed to happen.

They were the twin suns above, burning like infernos, but always balancing each other out. They were meant to be more than this world- not products of the 'Time Lords'' presumptuous selfishness.

He sobbed almost silently. He held his body tight against himself and he hid his face in his clothes.

There was no one there to console him.

He must've sat there for hours. In the still silence.

It was a lot to process and he took his time.

This was bigger than anything ever before.

This proved that everything he knew- everything he _was_ \- had always been a lie.

It tore his world apart. It dragged knives through his hearts and stress pounding harder than the drums at his mind.

He felt cold and could barely remember how to breathe by the time he was done. By the time he had run out of tears and there was no longer a reason to stay. His world had been turned upside down and it didn't even feel real anymore.

He wanted to go back to his Tardis and at least _try_ to forget. He probably couldn't, but the only thing left was fury boiling in his ears. If he acted now....

There would be no more Time Lords by sunrise.

The Master stood up and collected himself with a single deep breath. He brought the rough fabric of his coat sleeve to his face to dry his tears.

He had to get out of there before it overwhelmed him. Or perhaps before he took his rightful vengeance.

He ran to the stairs-

"What will you tell the Doctor?" A voice crashed over him, shattering the almost silence he had been wallowing in.

The Master starred up, glassy eyes widening at the sight of the leader of the Gallifreyan High Council towering over him.

In full attire, the robes, the headdress, the staff, he was intimidating enough to make the Master falter- for only a second- and take a sharp step back.

The Master raised his hands to keep the councilman at arm’s length. The man made no indication that he was there to harm the Master. He just stood there with one hand on his staff and the other at his side. However, the Master knew not to trust so easily.

The Time Lords had gone through a lot of work to keep this secret buried and the Master certainly knew he had nothing valuable enough to his name to keep him alive, should these monsters choose to kill him.

That rage swelled up again. That of a child who had once trusted their parental figures and abided by their every belief only to be tormented at every turn.

Used. Exploited. Relentlessly taken advantage of.

Still, the Master could find no mercy in the high councilman's eyes.

The only thing settled in that soulless void of his eyes was fear.

Fear over what the unstoppable force they'd created would do to them if the child they'd tortured ever found out the truth- _if the Doctor_ ever found out the truth.

"I'll tell her whatever I'd like," the Master challenged.

He refused to back down and refused to be intimidated. He was the Master after all. He would live up to his name.

More High Council members appeared from either side of the stairwell, trickling down to join the leader and blocking the Master's exit. They boxed him in, uncaring, encircling him and ready to push him back against the panopticon.

The Master didn't move. He would no longer allow these monsters a hold over him. He would no longer let them use him- or the Doctor- or anyone for their own gain ever again.

The Master may be hurt and damaged, but he wasn't completely broken just yet. He had always clung to the Doctor- the one person who could always pull him back from the brink. The Master's one friend- and now these were the people who had taken that from him as well.

The only thing he still cared for was the Doctor- in his own twisted way. Their games kept him sharp, their history kept him as sane as he could ever be. The Doctor was the only one who understood this throbbing agony the cruel world had planted in his very soul.

And now none of it was true. None of it was ever the truth. The Doctor was destined for greatness and yes they were used but they finally escaped and found a purpose.

But the Master? The Master would be nothing to the Doctor when she found out the truth. Less than nothing. Not an old friend. Not anything. Just a blip in the Doctor's history that would soon be forgotten; just as the Doctor had forgotten all the other people they'd met in their long forgotten past.

The Master couldn't help but laugh.

Waves of paradoxical laughter increased in amplitude as they crashed over him, shaking him, and escaping him such force that the Time Lords around him hesitated.

It was all a lie. Of course it was. The Master... well, he should have known better to think he could have any sign of hope in this rotting decay of a relentless universe.

He laughed so hard he could barely stay standing.

"You're scared of the Doctor? You're scared of your own creation?!" The harsh words tore violently from his dry lips. His yell echoed about the room from every angle.

Once he wore the last of his good nature out- once his last laugh had subsided and die away- a grim smile consumed his face. One that barely felt real, that showed his gorgeous teeth, that put up an unrelenting defense while he suffered silently inside.

" _You should be scared of me!_ " the Master screamed, almost deafening in the enormous room, "You may have used her to build your civilization, but _I_ will ensure its downfall."

He turned to the center platform and leapt upon it like a stage. He looked over the Time Lords- not the Gods of Time but the Devils of this Hell- and the Master grinned.

"You used her. You. _Used. ME._ What do you think you can possibly do or say that will stop me?" He challenged.

A few of them appeared worried, but not scared.

Not yet anyways.

However the Master promised himself that before sunrise... damn them all, he would make sure they spent their last moments _terrified_.

It was less than they deserved, but it would have to suffice for now.

The Master's chest rose and fell quickly, his jaw tight to his teeth, his eyes unforgiving. He blinked ever so slowly, shook his head ever so slightly. He already knew what he had to do.

His eyes were still glassy, but there were no tears left enough to fall.

He was _ever so stubborn_ \- and his mind was made up.

"You are but one man," the lead Time Lord scoffed.

The others followed in suit. There were more now. Not only the High Council, but guards filing in. More than enough to block every possible way out.

"You've brought quite a lot of help for just one man," the Master countered.

He reached for his inside pocket and pulled out a small device. It was no larger than a small tin box- but the power it contained was so much more.

The Master raised his hands to feign innocence- so show that he held no weapon (at least to their knowledge)- and the guards settled ever so slightly.

"You do have..." the High Councilman shifted nervously, "a record."

The Master grinned even wider, prideful to hear his own actions had made him notorious since last they'd all last met. He'd torn so many worlds down since then. Everyone needs a hobby after all.

"Then you know that I will be leaving here of my own accord," the Master grinned, watching the Time Lords surrounding him grow more tense with every passing moment.

There were 15 in all. He made a note to remember their faces. He would exact a specific, harsher form of vengeance on these miserable creatures.

"Actually, I'm afraid you won't be leaving here at all," the Time Lord responded with more confidence than he had earned.

The Master laughed again, a switch already pressed on the device in his hand. He always had a back up plan after all. Always an escape route. This was no different.

He only hoped he could survive it.

His smile was gone from his face in an instant, the dim lights above casting a shadow over his features.

"Not terrible- as far as final words go," he taunted, "However, you could have stopped at: 'I'm afraid'."

The timer on his device reached zero and the shock wave of the explosion burst through the room. At the same instant, the guard rails of the Matrix shot up around the Master's body- effectively protecting him from any and all debris as well as the deadly shock wave that had ripped through the hall and ripped through the soft organs of his audience.

As the echo of the blast subsided, the Master pressed another button and the Matrix rails fell away. He felt a slight ringing in his ears from where the shock wave had managed to reach him through the barrier of electric rings. It hurt like hell, but at least it blocked out the groans of the dying Time Lords around him as they bled from the inside out across the Matrix floor. Between the shrapnel and the shock wave at such close range causing ruptures of blood vessels and liquidation of organs- they'd all be dead in minutes if they weren't already.

The Master glanced about the room littered with bodies.

A few had died on impact of their heads into the floor, but most were writhing away their last moments in agony.

Good. This was the least they deserved.

The Master stepped down and made his way to the stairs- uninterrupted this time.

He sniffed a brief 'Lucky you,' as he kicked one of the already-dead bodies out of his path.

These were only the very first of his casualties.

They would soon regenerate while the Master set up their final demise and, to the Master's joy, he would soon get to kill them all again.

And again.

And again.

He had waited so many lives for his vengeance, and now he had no doubt in his mind- no nagging shred of doubt- that _this_ was what he was meant for.

The Doctor was the Time Lords' beginning and the Master would be their end.

His shoes clicked softly as he made a beeline through the citadel and to where he had left his Tardis. People were running and screaming, panicking over what had happened and who had been inside.

Not one person attempted to stop the Master as he left the Citadel and walked out into that same old sand. This time, the dust and sand caked over the thick layer of blood soaking the soles of his shoes. For once, the way it covered his sins was a comfort.

Almost as if the planet itself- where so many had died so pointlessly- might actually find solace in the Master's revenge.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was so much fun to write tbh lol  
> I really like the flow of how it turned out


	2. The Last Time Lord

It really only did take until sunrise for it all to fall.

The Master had thought that perhaps, with the amount of explosives and the sheer surface area in need of being decimated, it might take longer.

However, it did not.

The Master watched the suns rise high in the sky. The brightest first and the second, dimmer star soon after.

He sat there all day. Listening to the numerous crackling fires, listening to the absolute silence of what had once been a city, and before that a battlefield, and before that: a home.

And he watched the first sun set as it moved on to illuminate the other side of the planet. Moved to oversee what might as well be a different world entirely. And the Master watched still, as the dimmer sun spared the surface one last glance before finishing what the other had started.

He was the dimmer sun. The one chasing someone bolder and brighter and stronger. But it didn't matter, not really.

Because he was still infinitely more powerful than every other tiny blip of light in the night sky.

He would never be what the Doctor is. He knew better to think he could be by now.

He was the Master, and he needed to cut the Doctor down to size.

-

Humans think grief happens in stages. In waves. In categories one can switch between and conceptualize.

They're wrong.

Grief is a void. It's a place you become trapped in. It's a room of keys which you can not escape without finding the correct one. And the 'correct one' is often not the same for any two people. And the box is dark. And you are there alone.

There aren't words for it. Many will try, but there is no vocal expression to match the way grief slowly drives a blunt knife directly through your chest.

What it is, is being powerless again forces bigger than yourself. To want something different when the outcome is inevitable.

It's an incredible thing really. The way a living creature can fall numb in its presence, or lash out when the feeling is perhaps the farthest thing from one's mind.

It can ruin people, torment people, or even shield them.

It's not any one thing at any one time, but it will always hurt like hell.

People usually see grief as a loss- usually of another creature in any way significant to one's life. However grief can also be the loss of items, of time, of opportunities and possibilities. A loss of a relationship to something other than yourself- rather than the loss of the second party itself. The loss of how that other item or person defined who you were.

At its core, grief is often a loss of self.

It's not losing his homeworld, or the people, or his connection to the Doctor that he's grieving- but the loss of these things which he had spent all his lives defining himself by. He had thought himself the Doctor's friend, Gallifrey's savior, the universe's Master to be.

And now every link was severed.

In a strange way, that's what the Master is feeling.

Not being broken- but the torment of being close to it. He is only functioning because he still has a reason to. He still has something to live for.

Death would be easier, but he always has been so bloody resilient. He doesn't have the ability to kill himself. Not really. The instinct to survive is too strong, but it's his spite that drives him.

It's not what you think. It's not that he wants to cause harm in and of itself. It's that his revenge will- in some strange way- restore balance.

It's to give the universe back what it gave him. To see the bloodbath and end the suffering.

He almost sees it as doing the universe service- in his own mangled way.

And this is why the Master sets himself up at MI6 and takes on the life of 'Agent O'.

It's the first step of his plan to say one last goodbye to all the things he'd built his existence upon.

He wants to be the Doctor's friend one last time, to dress up and play the game and reveal himself, to be her best enemy once more.

He wants to show her what he's done to Gallifrey and tell her why it had to be done.

He wants, one last time, to be understood in that inexplicable way the Doctor understood him when they were young and free of all this unbearable misery.

The Master never grieves what he did to Gallifrey, because he believes they brought this upon themselves.

However, he is sorry it had to end this way.

All those people, all that potential, all that power.

He's not sorry it's gone. The Master sees it's end as what he was always meant for. If the Doctor was the beginning, then he had be the end. That was just who they both were.

Still, the Master grieved for its lost potential, for what it could have been, for what it could have been made into.

Had their corrupt, selfish world taken the child in, had they given the child love and support, had they allowed the child to grow and learn and discover. Had they built the world up the way they should have....

It could have been beautiful.

It could have been as the child grew up to be. It could have become so much more.

Most of all, he grieved his loyalty to the Doctor. He could never separate his love for her from his hatred- although try as he might- and that made it hurt so much more. To be the Doctor's friend again was his own way of wishing her a goodbye. Of looking at their old friendship and knowing that it was something stronger than either of them, in any life, under any circumstances.

It was all lies, but being her friend again, being built up to what they now were because they were the foundation of each other. It never stopped tearing him apart.

Even when he held onto his guilt for Gallifrey even when he felt it was what he was meant for. To be the Doctor's friend again- to say goodbye in his own twisted way- and betray her because he knew now that nothing good was ever built to last and it would be so much easier to break away before the Doctor left him again.

When he asked for the Doctor's hand... and the Doctor said 'never'... the Master took it anyways because he needed to show her his work. He needed to make her see what he had seen. He needed, so very badly, to help her understand that this is what they were meant for and that he needed her help for their story to end.

He showed her their destroyed home, the citadel, everything that it had taken chasing her through time, and reliving the 20th century, and using the cybermen- to tell her.

The Master showed the Doctor her past, he showed her the pain, and he showed her that the Time Lords couldn't hurt them any longer. The Master had proudly killed every last one of them.

Well....

Of course....

Apart from himself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I ended up with this awkward middle bit but I still wanted to include it bc I think it connects the Master's discovery to this next chapter pretty well. Plus I think it gives the Master's whole scheme a little more depth because in his personal timeline, he discovers all of this before Spyfall parts 1&2  
> Anyways I'm really excited to share the next chapter


	3. Reconciliation

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This fic was inspired by a few different things, but I'd be remiss not to mention [this incredible artwork](https://64.media.tumblr.com/a80490819dd5717e322372cc61decdb6/b1cf6c416bdd375a-af/s2048x3072/d2b4049e03c4cf3bacaea329a972cd9fd132c45e.png) by [flaielis on Tumblr](https://flaielis.tumblr.com/) !!

"And look at us. I have broken you and created a new race. And now? Now I shall conquer... everything," the Master beamed.

It was the perfect ultimatum:

We die together, or I ruin the universe you've crowned yourself the ultimate protector of.

Like the Doctor, the Master knew she would never kill herself without a reason. She didn't have his vision for the big picture. That was why he had set up the perfect no win scenario to keep her from running, like she had always done from everything.

Still, she wasn't getting it. Her face so close to his, her eyes so wild and unrelenting. She spoke of herself being more, as if it wasn't the thing that caused the Master more pain than anything.

"You think you've broken me? You'll have to try harder than that. You've given me a gift. Of myself. You think that could destroy me? You think that makes me lesser? It makes me more. I contain multitudes more than I ever thought or knew. You want me to be scared of it because you're scared of everything. But I am so much more than you."

The Master was nearly winded for a moment. Of course he was scared. Anyone in their right mind world be. Anyone who knew the atrocities done to them by the people they had blindly trusted would know how fitting it was to be scared.

All he could muster was a breath. A gasp of disbelief that the smartest person he knew was somehow _still not getting it_.

"Wow." He mocked, truly disappointed. She was his best enemy after all. She must have come here with more than that at her disposal.

"So, why are we here?" He pressed.

The Master grinned as the Doctor pulled a device from her pocket. Perfect.

The two of them, surrounded by the group of Time Lords who had hurt them the most- the Time Lords who had stolen the Doctor's abilities but who were now commanded by the Master's hand.

The Time Lords and now a brain-dead army of Cyber- _Masters_.

She was the beginning and he was the end.

The Master believed it was beautiful.

"Oh, good, very good!" the Master beamed as the Doctor showed the device more fully, "That's why I left it for you. Wondered if you would... take out me, take out these lifeforms, all those bodies still in the vaults, every organic cellular life form on this planet... forever. And yourself. Do that, would you?"

The Master was scared, more scared than he'd ever been in his life. And still, he was so very excited. So very, very thrilled.

"Yes." The Doctor promised somberly, "This time, yes."

"Go on, then," the Master pleaded, his voice a little less demanding than he had meant for it to be. It had been so long for him since he had uncovered the truth and he was so excited to finally spell it out.

"You were the start of all of this, now finish it."

She extended the weapon, her eyes locked on the Master's.

He needed this. He needed it to end.

It was all a lie. They'd never been who they’d believed.

They were never meant to be the way they had grown up believing and the Master _needed_ it to be over.

There was no more story to write, no reason to continue when the novel was broken.

They were already so close to broken, the Master so close to dragging the Doctor to his level, so close to being something resembling equal.

The best of friends and the best of enemies.

"Come on, come on. Come on! Come on, come on! What have you got left anyway?"

He was talking about the Doctor obviously. And not himself.

"You don't even know your own life."

Yes, her. Of course her. Always her.

"Look how low I have brought you. I have won, Doctor."

Her thumb was on the button now. She stretched it about and let it hover just over the button. She was so close, so nearly there. The Master _needed_ her to push her over the edge. To just _do it already_ \- because he certainly couldn't.

"You may have made me..." he articulated every next word so very carefully, so full of intent, "-but I have _destroyed_ you."

"Become death," he breathed in awe.

"Become me."

It was all he wanted. For her to be like him. For her to break like he was so close to doing.

He needed her broken. He needed her to be where he was. It was the only way he could convince her.

"Come on. Come on, come on!" He pleaded.

The Doctor's eyes stared deeper into his. The Master was practically kneeling before her, his body bent over and twisted but still staring up at her like she was the sun.

He needed her to do it.

He needed it to end.

He was surprised when she stepped closer, something shifting ever so slightly in her expression. She reached ever so carefully for him and pulled the Master into her arms.

"Tell them to leave," the Doctor said softly, her words grazing his ear.

The Master scanned her cold gaze, baffled, but then complied.

"You lot, get out," he turned to the Time Lords with a shout.

He watched them file out up the stairs, reminding him of a different time when he had stood there but in reverse.

When they were gone, he melted closer against the Doctor.

He was exhausted. And so was she.

And they settled down to their knees on the raised center platform. The Master tightened his hold on the Doctor's coat, but he could barely feel a thing. He ducked his head, not wanting to look at her for once.

She could press the button anytime. The trigger remained settled ever so comfortably in her left hand.

She didn't hug him, but her hands settled on his shoulders and her free hand briefly gave the back of his neck a reassuring squeeze.

The Master was sure her eyes remained on the item. Thinking. Wondering. Contemplating. Trying to reach acceptance in that human-y way the Master knew she believed in.

The Master's forehead met the Doctor's right shoulder as he closed his eyes and he waited.

The Doctor would press it when she was ready, of her own accord. And the Master would not move until she did.

The seconds were agony, but knowing it would end any second now kept him calm.

The lies. The death. This world.

The Master needed it to be over. He had won. He was ready to stop playing.

"We don't have to do this," the Doctor said. Her words escaped with no emotion behind them.

"Please," the Master begged.

He didn't care what it took.

He wanted it over. Their relationship was built on a lie. It had no future. The Master knew that. Why couldn't the Doctor see that? Why couldn't she see that they could be free of it all if she would just press the damn button and they could go into the unknown together?

"I'm tired too... but we can find another way," the Doctor offered, "This might not even kill me."

"I like my odds," the Master growled into her shoulder, his body tense and never once letting down his guard.

"I- I don't know if I can," the Doctor confessed, staring curiously down the trigger.

The Master shook his head slightly, his eyes tightly shut.

"You have to. I... I can't."

The Master didn't hear the Doctor answer for a long minute of torment. He wished she would just press it already. There was nowhere more to go from here.

He needed them to be even for once in all their lives.

"I don't want to die," the Doctor said suddenly,

"I'm not sure I'm ready. I never thought I'd make it this far."

"Then go out on top," the Master hissed, "before you end up like me."

"What? Full of regret?" The Doctor said bluntly.

"I don't have any regrets," the Master growled, "There just isn't anything left."

There was a brief moment of silence.

"Alright," the Doctor shrugged.

The Master's fingers tightened around his coat and he braced himself for her to do it.

He felt her forearm move against his shoulder and heard a sharp click from behind his head.

The Master felt as though there was something more he should have said, but it was already too late.

-

The Master was reasonably certain he was dead for several minutes. He sat so still, his body so tense, that he couldn't think of any other answer. His arms remained so tightly around the Doctor he was scared to open his eyes in case she was no longer there.

He felt her hands grab him. Her hands... which meant the device was no longer in them. He felt the Doctor pull him more fully against her, as if she could somehow protect him.

The Matrix was broken. There was nothing to save them.

Nothing as the world shook from the particle blast and the world around them was destroyed.

It was over and gone and the Master was so convinced of it that he couldn't bring himself to move a single muscle.

He had absolutely no idea how long it had been until he heard the Doctor chuckle.

Knowing there was no way he had possibly earned himself a place in any Heaven-equivalent: the Master lifted his head.

He found himself still there, in the real world, and the Doctor was _laughing_.

The Master pulled back from her arms and whipped his head about- but there was no bomb in sight. He leapt to his feet and spun about angrily.

"Where is it!" He shouted.

The Doctor only laughed harder, her voice echoing about the room.

The Master grabbed the front of her coat and dragged her up to her feet.

"What have you done?!" He shouted.

The Doctor pulled the bomb from her pocket, no cyberman attached.

"I adjusted the particle to take out everything that wasn't a Time Lord. It wasn't really that hard really. I just smashed the little guy and the particle went off like BOOM!"

The Doctor raised her hands to imitate.

She grinned, so very proud of herself.

The Master could only stare at her.

"That wasn't the point! The point was to die!" the Master paced about the stage. He ran a hand through his hair.

That was the plan. There was no other plan. He didn't want to walk out of here and watch the sand and dust coat his shoes all over again.

He wanted them to die, their story over, their legacies unparalleled.

"I have a better idea," the Doctor said softly.

He turned to her.

"Come with me?" She offered a hand.

The Master simply stared at her. That same old smile, worn by so many faces, and yet always brightest when it was directed at him.

"Just us. You may be upset about the past and you may believe we have no future- but it's like that lady said in the Matrix. You and me? We've never been limited by who we were before. We've come a long way from being students in this miserable place and we're more than we ever were before," the Doctor beamed lightheartedly.

"You betray me and team up with aliens to kill humanity, I leave you to suffer at the hands of some of the worst humans who have ever lived while trying to save humanity- sorry about that by the way, I really thought you would have had a secret way out of there- and then we learn from it."

The Master looked her over, trying to gauge the genuineness of her offer.

Maybe he had really died after all. But... well there's no way the universe would offer him anything good, even in the afterlife.

"I'll listen this time," the Doctor promised, her eyes just a little glassier than usual,

"Truth is, I don't want to be more. I just want us to be friends again. It... was nice having you to talk to, even if you were just pretending to be human to gain my trust," she shrugged, "I've really missed that. You give surprisingly good advice."

The Doctor hand had been extended for a while now, but the Master hadn't taken it yet. He wasn't even quite sure why.

"My friends are back home," the Doctor added a little softer, "Where they should be. They think I'm dead, that I came back here to kill the two of us. No one will bother us."

The Master shook his head in an attempt to push down the tears. He swallowed hard.

"I don't want to be your pet."

The Doctor shook her head,

"I won't lock you anywhere! I shouldn't have done that. That regeneration, I don't really know what I was thinking!"

The Master sniffed sharply.

"No. You're... You're immortal..."

The Doctor's face fell as the Master continued.

"I don't want to be a pet, to take up such a small part of your life in the grand scheme of things. That's why I wanted us to die I wanted-"

His eyes fell to his shoes to stop himself.

There was a pause as the Doctor wracked her mind for an answer.

All at once, she actually found one,

"Then... I'll heal you. You said the cap was _set_ at 12 lives, right? But the genetics for far more are still there, tucked away! The two of us? We're brilliant!" The Doctor grinned, "We'll unlock it and we'll watch out for each other? Yeah?"

The Master found her shining eyes once more.

The Doctor was so full of hope this time around.

So optimistic.

Maybe she could be hopeful enough for the both of them.

"I'll get you through this, I promise. I- I didn't realize how much you were hurting. Master, please. Please, come with me?"

The Master finally took her hand. His fingers were shaking, dirt and blood trapped under his nails, callouses from all the times he'd been in fights or used weapons- but the Doctor didn't mind.

There were tears brimming in his eyes, but he was in too much disbelief to let them fall.

"I...." the Master faltered, turning away briefly.

"Please," the Doctor begged, putting her other hand over his, "It's miserable alone."

The Master nearly chuckled, "Tell me about it."

"Is that a yes?" The Doctor asked softly.

The Master's head was spinning. It was all he'd ever wanted and... he hadn't even realized how close in his grasp it had been.

"I'm going to do things you won't like," he warned.

"It wouldn't be fun any other way," the Doctor agreed.

The Master flicked a tongue over his dry lips.

"Okay," he nodded.

"Really?" The Doctor exclaimed, almost breathless with relief.

The Master nodded more firmly, doing his best to act annoyed despite the smile taking over his face without his permission.

The Doctor grinned and pulled him by the hand.

She led him down the long halls like when they were kids, but she held tight to his hand and made sure he didn't fall behind. They found themselves laughing ridiculously, their voices echoing through the empty halls. For once, there was no fear in their many hearts as they did so.

She led them to a different Tardis than either of them had; a better, more accurate model with a gorgeous, soft purple trim and warm amber lights.

"I'm so tired," the Doctor confessed.

"Oh thank the stars, so am I," the Master admitted.

The Doctor chuckled.

"We can always pick our next destination over breakfast tomorrow," the Doctor suggested.

The Master laughed and pressed the first of many switches on the console controls.

"Looks like breakfast tomorrow it is. I know of the perfect diner near the edge of the universe," he chuckled.

"Excellent! I've been wanting a fried egg sandwich."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm soft and I really, really want 13 to realize that the Master is hurt and for them to just talk like is that so difficult???  
> So here's my idea for an alternate ending lol
> 
> Please tell me what you think! I really need the motivation and I take requests if you happen to have a good idea you don't mind sharing lol  
> I hope you're all doing well! I really am trying to work on my other fics, I'll get around to it eventually lol


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